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Relationship Handling

Inner Well Being > Counselling Area > Relationship Handling
Relationship Handling

In any relation, when two people comes closer, they surely try to create boundaries for each other. If we observe all our relations closely, we will find that in that relation, we create boundaries for the other person and if that person (unknowingly) crosses “that boundary”, we become angry & situation goes beyond control.

What exactly are these boundaries? Have we ever given a thought about it? By creating such boundaries in our relations, we actually oppose the right of other person to take own decisions, and eventually, we impose our decisions on that person… In short, we disapprove another person’s Freedom… Which itself is “Inhuman”.

When someone’s freedom is been snatched away, the person becomes sad; and when in that same state of sadness boundaries are crossed by another person, we become sad.

If we respect each other’ freedom, then there will be no need & role of any boundaries in any relation. In other words, “Acceptance” is “Body” & “Freedom” is “Soul” to any relation.

Conflict is very normal in every type of relationship- from business to personal, and especially intimate relationships. Every person goes through it. This is for a number of reasons including the fact that when you enter into a relationship, it is not just between two people. It is between two unique personalities, shaped by unique circumstances.

Conflict can arise when we feel threatened. It is not about physical danger but relates more to our needs, wants, desires and most importantly, our expectations from the other person.

What Really Matters?

As stated above, conflict is very normal. Of course, it is not normal if the conflict is frequent and severe. But occasional conflict happens to all relationships.

How you manage and handle that conflict within your relationship, though, is the key to a healthy relationship. If you or your partner are prone to losing your temper, getting angry and becoming defensive, things can become very difficult- especially in the longer time.

Few points to manage healthy relationships:

  • Commit to Practice Healthy Anger
  • Lose the Frustration
  • Keep your emotions under control
  • Only Discuss Differences when Calm, stop if things get too agitated
  • Have a safe word
  • Understand that anyone can have a Bad Day
  • Don’t let it become Immature
  • Identify the problem and choose solution from both perspectives
  • Get back to normal
  • Revisit the discussion later
  • Be mindful of Time Limits
  • Forgive & Forget